Friday, December 25, 2015

It is the most wonderful (maddest) time of the year


Wednesday 23 December 2015

Sunny 13 degrees

Woke early to bright sunshine, packed up car and had breakfast.  A different selection of equally corpulent businessmen colonising the tables and small children jiggling in front of the telly.  Into the car and a warning light came on 'check fuel injection system'.  OH very very agitated so we found the nearest Renault garage who were very keen on offering us lots of tea and coffee but couldn't actually plug the car into a diagnostics machine until the afternoon.  Decided to risk it and drove to pick up WF.  The black mould remover had, miraculously, removed vast amounts of the mould and there was just a fraction remaining.  

After what seemed a very very long time, we arrived at Thurrock to OH's spiritual home, Costco.  It was like being in another world.  All of the white people were enormously fat, like Waynetta, and the rest of the people were African.  Everyone was calling each other 'babe' and saying thank you and sorry in each and every sentence.  I found some underwear and we bought some food for starters and the most immense carrot cake I have ever seen. Then went for lunch.  I will now have to rescind what I said about the corpulent business men.  They were nothing on the people in the Costco dining room.  I ordered a baked potato and I have never seen such a huge one. It was the length of my hand and piled high with at least 150 grams of coleslaw.  OH polished off a huge pizza and a fudge desert and WF had cottage pie and then finished off my potato.

Crammed the stuff into the already bulging car and headed over the Dartford Bridge, where you have to pay a toll but it is not signposted and you pay online.  There is only notification of obligation to pay on one side of the bridge and if you don't notice this, you receive a penalty notice which, by the time it gets to your postbox, has gone from the original 2.50 charge to about 60 quid.  I think this is totally illegal.  Today was quieter than yesterday, fortunately, when apparently it took people up to seven hours to get out of the Blue water shopping complex.  Christmas is the maddest time of the year.  On northwards on the M25 with huge queues in London direction.  The sprawl ended and beautiful country lanes appeared, with glimpses of brightly lit red brick houses and fine driveways.  I do love Suffolk.  Finally, just as the light is going, we arrive at Sister in Laws house, disgorge the car, eat yet more pizza and spend two hours on the phone to Renault assistance before we collapse to bed.